The Dirty Dozen

Ok, so there's nothing "dirty" about this post but I thought it might grab your attention. I'm talking about the dozen essential fashion items every woman MUST have in her closet.  I've read about a million fashion articles and every book I can get my hands on so trust me, I'm right on this:

1)  Undergarments - Ladies, get a bra that fits and underwear that banishes VPLs.  Get fitted by a professional bra fitter (and no, not those twits that work at the large lingerie box store that wear their boobs up to their chins).  You'd be shocked by what size bra you should actually be wearing and believe me, it is never the size you think and you are wearing the wrong size!  Now, the large lingerie box store does carry an excellent line of undies that eliminate VPLs (or chones for my Latin sisters out there) "Very Sexy" - try the hiphuggers.  They are the best!

2)  T-Shirt - Basic white/black T-shirt.  Get both.  Speaks for itself, no?  Good quality (Target & Talbot's have good ones).

3)  Crisp White Shirt - By crisp, I mean ironed.  By shirt, I mean with a collar.  Again, Talbot's has an excellent line.  White shirts are universal and can make any outfit look like you cared when you got dressed in the morning. 

4)  Neutral Colored Jacket - Yes, a blue jean jacket counts and no, they are not passé or country looking.  Work it with a beautiful pin or scarf and you have a staple that will last forever!  I have 3 (CAbi is my favorite).  Your other choices are a navy blue jacket, white, black or tan.  Lime green or pale pink DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT count as neutral on this planet.

5)  Scarf - Tan or Black work best but a solid bright color (like teal) will also go a long way.  Don't spend too much money on this item.  Buy in bulk at Target. 

6)  Jeans - Every woman (and man for that matter) needs that one pair of jeans that fits perfectly but I REFUSE to pay more than $50.00 for a pair.  Takes a little extra time but you can find a pair in that price range.  And please, no bling on your ass.  Seriously, it should look good in those jeans without rhinestones all over it. 

7)  Solid Colored Dress - The possibilities are endless.  For your fashion dollars, a SCD is extremely flexible and can be dressed up/down with a different belt, pin, jacket, etc....makes it look like a different dress each time.  Keep patterned dresses to a minimum.  Contrary to what you may think you see in your mirror, not every woman can pull it off. 

8)  Tailored Pants - Here is where you should invest some real bucks (at least three $$$ = minimum of $100.00).  You only need one pair - black, brown or tan (but not too light colored).  Get them tailored (hem, waist, etc.) to fit you perfectly.  Worth the money!

9)  Calf-length skirt - Another classic.  A-Line or belled skirts are my favorite and are universal.  A pair of heels (a pair of "heels" = 3 inches at a minimum) works best with a calf-length skirt.  If you insist on wearing flats, then do yourself a favor and wear a skirt above the knee.  Neutral colors again are better than patterned.  A recurring theme for me.

10)  Neutral Colored High Heeled Shoes - There is just no getting over this.  Every woman looks better in HHS.  And, every woman can wear them if they just practiced!  Stop being a wuss and get over the pain.  It's temporary and you can dull the pain with martinis.  It's a win-win as far am I'm concerned. 

11)  Chunky Necklace/Earrings Combo - My favorite is oversized pearls.  Of course, they're fake but Jackie O wore fake pearls too.  No shame in that.

12)  Wide Leather Belt (to be worn around your waist) - Real leather please, preferably from Italy (Chinese leather doesn't have the same smell).  Again, black, brown or tan.  Patent leather is beautiful also.  It will last forever. 


Hope this helps!